So, let's say you are happily single. Life is going well: the job is good, your friends are fun, your half-marathon training is going well, and your cat, Mr. Jingles, is good company during those times you have nothing else planned.
Then, one day you are at the local Whole Foods, trying to decide whether or not you will be able to get through two cartons of the two-for-one organic blueberries before they spoil. Suddenly, you notice that someone on the other side of the blueberry display is watching you.
Startled, you give the Jeremy Renner look-a-like a half-smile. He's not wearing a wedding ring. He smiles back. You notice organic dog food in his basket. He likes animals too.
"I find that when I buy both cartons, I end up wasting the second one, " Jeremy Renner says. You know it's you to whom he's speaking because you've turned around, assuming someone else is behind you - like his physicist-swimsuit model girlfriend. But nobody is there but you.
"You know, I could buy the berries and give you the free carton," he continues.
And you freeze. You went to Whole Foods expecting blueberries and that Jerk Tilapia they do so well. You did not go to Whole Foods expecting Jeremy Renner.
A call from a headhunter is not unlike this: the earliest stages of courtship.
It's unexpected. Think of the active job search market as online dating. Companies are aggressively looking, candidates are aggressively looking, and, at the end of the day, it's a numbers game. Plenty. Of. Fish. It's also time consuming and exhausting. When companies hire a search firm like mine to find candidates for a position, it's a bit like hiring one of those high-end matchmakers on TV. Think of me as Jeremy Renner (though frankly, I'm more of an Amy Poehler in real life): It's my role to hang out at the Whole Foods, keeping an eye out for good people. As I identify people who are a good potential fit for the role, I give them a call. The jobs I fill are good ones: I'm offering candidates a proverbial box of free organic blueberries. But still, candidates can be taken off-guard when, in the middle of minding their own business, they are invited to explore a new possibility. Try to be open to new things. There is no reward without some risk.
It's a time to get to know each other. OK, so let's say you allow Jeremy to buy you the blueberries and now you are sitting at the little area in the front of the store drinking your fair trade coffee with him. You find out that he's a divorced software sales manager who loves french bulldogs. You are a cat-loving hat designer who called off your engagement to your long-distance Swedish paramour Sven. And you both love The Eagles, Indian food, the colour persimmon, Ayn Rand books, and Jerk Tilapia (Jeremy bought some too.) You have some things in common, enough to arrange for another coffee meeting. This is how you should view the interview process with a search firm. You have a job: life is good. What you are trying to find out is if life could be better. Perhaps this new job would give you more autonomy, a broader scope, a heftier paycheque. At this point you are just exploring possibilities. Relax and have some fun with it.
It's a time to not rush forward (even though you really want to.) At some point in the process, it will hit you: OMG, I have just met Jeremy Renner and he loves animals and is employed! Depending on your age, you might also realize that you are statistically more likely to be hit by lightning than to have had this happen to you and you want to close the deal now now now. Before you get Vera Wang on your speed dial and have poor Jeremy running for the hills, you need to take a deep breath. If it's meant to be, Jeremy won't go anywhere. He'll realize that there are not many of you - Gwyneth Paltrow meets Tina Fey - on the planet. Companies are probably interviewing a number of candidates, but if they have hired a search firm, it's because there are not that many people who can do the job. Relax. If it's a good long term fit, it will happen.
Don't have a one track mind. The first thing most candidates want to know is what the job pays. I have a mortgage too: I get it. But salary discussions are a bit like sex. Wait a few dates before bringing it up. A search firm will be feeding the client good information about what the market is paying. If they are willing to pay to hire a search firm to fill your role, they are not going to lose you over a few dollars. If you seem too fixated on the topic, your motivation may be called into question. Again, relax.
It's a time to look for red flags. Confession time: The reason things did not work out with Sven is he took a strong liking for Bjorn. All of those ABBA posters on his wall that time you visited him in Stockholm should have been a clue. Live and learn. Take your time to get to know Jeremy. See how he treats his dogs. See how he treats his mom. Does he tip the waitress? Is he respectful? How is he under stress? How is he when he meets your busty friend wearing that white tennis dress in the rain? Believe me, Jeremy is looking to see how you behave in a variety of situations. The dating process is a two-way street. The job interview process is no different. If it's a publicly traded company, read what the analysts say about management. If it's privately held, find out about the owners. Why did the last person leave? Why is the role hard to fill? The earlier in the process you find out about the bad stuff, the easier it is to go your separate ways. And if there are no deal-breakers? Nirvana!
Consider cultural differences. Perhaps you come from hearty stock who would only take a rest from work if someone were hospitalized. Maybe Jeremy was the baby in a laid-back family who believed a lot in napping. This might be a problem down the road. The same applies to the workplace. If you come out of a hierarchical, rule-bound organization, working for a creative start-up with a bunch of 20 year olds might just blow your mind. Unless you've been itching for a change, in which case it will rock your world. Don't be bound by what you've done in the past. Think about what you want now.
Consider balance. Maybe you'd like to see Jeremy three days a week. Maybe Jeremy would like to see you once every three weeks so he can work, work out, hang with his posse, practice with his band, and date other girls. This could be a problem. Ditto if you are a nine-to-fiver who is about to take on a job with a 24/7 culture. Work-life balance is key and a valid point to discussion during an interview. Remember, we called you. You have a good thing going already. You can choose to be picky.
This is the time to run. If Jeremy, cute as he is, starts to bring up topics such as astral projection, that time he was in prison, or his need to stock up on anti-itch creme, don't hesitate to run for the hills. If you mentioned these things, he'd be running. Nobody will be upset if you discover that a job is not a good fit early in the process. When you've accepted the job, the paperwork has been drawn up, your office has been repainted and your predecessor let go, they might get angry when you declare, "maybe I'm just not that into you."
If you just got married, fess up. To be clear, I am not Ashley Madison. If you have just joined a new company to take your dream job, you should not be interested in what I have to say. Yes, I'm Jeremy Renner: new on the scene and kind of exciting. But you're with Brad Pitt. He's promised to stand by you through thick and thin. God bless. And if you have the name of any eligible single friends, please pass them on.
Happy hunting!
Nancy
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